Reflections of 2013

Sitting here tonight Dec 18th one week before Christmas and watching the Barbara Walters Special on looking back to the "Most Fascinating People of 2013" really got me thinking about what all has happened in the Moen household this past year.  Below is a synopsis of the year.

2013 Started off a little slow, but then quickly got worse when I received the sad news of the death of a good friend, Angel Thomas.  That started this year with multiple deaths of people I knew.  January was also when I officially found out that at some point this year I would loose my job and began the search.  Although, we had a positive with the Redskins NFC East Champs went for trying to win Playoff game 1, but we lost.

February started out like any other month of love. Bob and I went to NY to visit with family, go to our favorite Italian restaurant and see our close friend Jay for Valentines Day weekend.  I just knew in my gut (one time I'm glad I listened) we HAD to go up to Albany to minister to Jay whom was having a very hard time with a family situation (as we now know of the separation with his wife).  

  What stands out to me the most was a conversation we had where he said, "Stef, I have a stupid question.  Do you know where I can get a bible?"

  I told him, "Not a stupid question...yes I do..."  Gave him a few suggestions like add the Bible app to his phone, then I felt compelled to purchase him a bible. 

  "Stef, you know what really got me was the fact your brother ate MOST of the Chick-fil-A nuggets on your wedding day and I didn't get any."

  "I'm sorry Jay."

Jay appreciated I had gotten him the Bible but he LOVED that I brought him all the way from VA Chick-fil-A nuggets!  He said, "OH MY GOD YOU ARE SO AWESOME!"   He gave me the biggest hug and a kiss on the cheek, and gave Bob a big hug and thanks for the cigar.  But little did I know when we left the parking lot that evening and we honked and smiled and waved "Bye" to each other that would be the last moment I would see Jay alive! :(  Julian With passed away 4 days later.  We were right there by his side one last time with the help of a few friends whom helped us with funds to get to the funeral/viewing.  Not a day goes by do we not think of Jay and we KNOW he is looking after us to this day!  I also had some other shocking news this year from my family that has still been an adjustment.  Also, I later found out that Jay had been reading the bible I gave him.

March, I had two more people I knew pass away.  One was my very own Dr. Rajan.  Rest of month was pretty slow for us.

In April I celebrated the best drama teacher Pat Quinn with her retirement party and I was able to see friends hadn't seen from HS in years!  I also celebrated my 36th birthday in April.

May 19th brought our 1 year Wedding Anniversary!  Bob took me to the place he proposed, National Harbor in MD to McCormick and Schmidt's.  I paid off my last Student load, and was one more step closer to being debt free.  Found out I was skin cancer Free.

June was pretty slow.  Except I started to go to a dr for some medical issues I was beginning to have.  It was the start of a roller coaster of emotions, faith and trust.  June 15th mom and I also went to the Verizon Center to see the NKOTB, Boyz II Men, and 98 degrees concert!

July came when I was looking forward to the most.  Bob went for the first time in decades to Disney with me and my parents.  Of course I got a really bad case of food poisoning and wasn't able to enjoy the vacation as I would have liked and Bob didn't get to visit Sea World as he wanted.  We will go back again!

August began with the return of Redskins football and training camp beginning down in Richmond, VA.  We didn't make the trip.  I even learned to sew for the first time with a sewing machine.   Bob and I went on a spontaneous trip to Albany, NY and made a stop at the new Ridgewood, NJ Carlos Bakery store.  Mom and I went to Wolftrap and saw Josh Groban perform.  I saw One Republic perform at Wolftrap in Aug. or Sept.

September was an tough month for me.  First started out I found out that my job was going away sooner than had realized and was going thru some tough medical testing.  I ran/walked a 5K Return to Football run for the first time in less than 58:00 seconds.  Proudest moment I had this year without training.  The roughest moment for me was when I had surgery one day after Bob's b-day to remove a 4.8cm fibroid that had grown behind my uterus and some endometreous.  This was done b/c it had become pretty uncomfortable for me and in order to hopefully become pregnant one day I knew I needed to get this done for myself.  Bob also turned 40 years old!  My back door neighbor Steve, lost his battle to cancer.

October I surprised my husband for his 40th birthday (on the 6th), I surprised him with his mom and step-dad coming down from NY, and several friends came as well. 

In November Bob and I went to Ferguson Fine Arts Center in Newport News and meet Buddy V from Cake Boss!! :)  I was officially unemployed on the 16th and I celebrated Thanksgiving with my parents and brother at their house, where I actually helped to cook for the first time in years!  Paid off our Jared bill and became two bills away from being debt free.

Now it's December and I'm STILL actively looking for work.  Paid off our couch payment, only one bill away from being debt free!  Bob and I had the opportunity to meet Redskins VP Bruce Allen on Dec 8th when we were at a Snowy/Icy game against Kansas City Chiefs.  We're still hoping to get pregnant one day soon and looking forward to celebrating Christmas remembering the ones that have passed before me and looking forward to a new year with new beginnings and a greater story than this year. 

Whew, that's 2013 in a nutshell.  I can only hope that 2014 will be a great year of new beginnings!  I believe 2014 is going to be a year of unexpected blessings!  I can feel it now!

Enganniversary (1 year engagement anniversary)

So it's hard to believe that it's been a year now since January 3, 2011 that I've been engaged to Bob. Let me share some things which I have learned in this past year of our whirlwind engagement.

1. Guys will surprise you when you least expect it!

Never under estimate your man! One thing is for certain they like to keep us on our toes! Don't think that he won't change his mind about the tux, grooms gifts, cake flavor or design, or yes even the honeymoon! They actually can be just like us ladies, very uncertain or undecided at any given time! Bob's biggest surprise to me was him changing his opinion on the style of tux vest/tie that he wanted to wear (trust me I was surprised by the sudden change of heart in style!

2. Many people do want a say in things concerning the wedding.

Do you mean to say they will frustrate me with picky choices, or not like my choice? Yes, you can expect that. What do I mean by that you ask? Well let me say this men can be very opinionated and my man sure has when I least expected him to be. Listen to them though as they do offer some good advice from time to time even if it's not how you imagine it in your head. Others have been the same, and no I haven't followed this advice like I should have which is why I'm writing it. Others do have some good ideas to expand on your dream wedding, sometimes it goes and sometimes it just doesn't! But I can say give them a fair chance you could be surprised at the outcome. Trust me I'm still learning this one!

3. Recognize whom you really want at your wedding, there maybe surprises along the way.

People will disappoint you and break your heart, while others will be pushy and expect an invite and others will be so excited and honored to attend your special occasion. Caution though as there will also be the occasional few whom will want to steer you away from getting married all together! Yes, some could be offering very thought provocative issues in a godly manner, while others may not be. And others could just be stirring up trouble as well. Follow your heart with what you feel is best, and most importantly pray about it and what was said, but make sure to follow what you know Gods truth and direction is leading you to in your life. Recognize not everyone will agree with your choice in a life partner or in your upcoming marriage BUT if you follow what God has called you to do then you can't go wrong! Yes this can be very sad but it's part of growing and recognizing whom true friends are and in knowing who will truly support your marriage in good and bad times!

4. Choose your wedding party wisely.

Choosing the wedding party can either be very easy or very difficult. Ladies choose a Matron/Maid of honor whom you can count on no matter what life my throw their/your way! You will need that person in so many ways! Know you have some one whom knows your tastes and respects you enough to make the right decisions. Find gal whom is a planner, a thinker and one whom loves to help in any way! Ensure to have a good relationship with the lucky lady because there will some intimate details between you shared and you will need her help in several areas in the days leading up to the wedding, to the day of and past the big day. I can truly say my Matron of Honor is all of these things plus some!!! Choose bridesmaids and groomsmen whom you can rely on that will do the same and stand by you, and your future spose and your decisions!

We've had a few hiccups along the way with three former wedding party attendants, however the lessons I have gotten have been very valuable! Your TRUE friends who love you, respect you, pray and truly want what's best for you and know you inside out will be by you no matter what! Same applies to the gentlemen as well. Know sometimes even the ones you don't think will fail you are the very ones that do. So really trust your gut and think them through! (side note I'm still good friends with a couple of them, it just takes time, forgiveness, love and prayer!)

5. Stick to your guns and your heart!

There are just some whom are still living in the 60's - 80's era in their mind will give you responses like "Well it wasn't done that way back in our days." or "Well we didn't have that at our wedding why do you need it?" Or my favorite, "you should do this instead." I have found that many want to put in their opinions whether wanted or not into decisions or visions which I've had for my wedding for a long time.

Stick to what you have always wanted within budgetary means of course for the wedding and/or reception. I have been able to save in a few areas and splurge on the honeymoon some. Some have not agreed with my color scheme but I love it and that's all that matters! I've learned to bend a little but I have stuck to what I have been dreaming about all my life in many areas. And still be able to make some happy and some not.

6. Stand by your man.

Times can be hard for them just as well! Mine has had multiple health concerns this year and challenges! But one thing is for certain it means the world to them when you are there to love and pray and support them no matter what! Always remember what caused you to fall in love with them in the first place to get you to say "Yes I'll marry you!". Pray daily for him, for his walk with the Lord and for his mind. Work at the relationship on both ends and be supportive in his decisions for his job and life. When you stand by him and support him and encourage him... He will once again surprise you and show you how much his love is for you. Also, I've been learning how to respect him more...no it's not easy and yes I fail at this quite often...but I'm trying to learn and the benefits do reap when I do so. Watch and listen when he's talking with friends and encourage him to be the best supporter he can be, friend, and protector and provider!

7.  Pray about every thing for your marriage, wedding, honeymoon and where you will live.

I have found along the way that it is important to really pray often and a lot for your marriage, wedding, honeymoon and where you will live even all the little things you don't think will matter they really do. Pray about EVERYTHING, the bible tells us to pray without ceasing and to pray about everything with prayer and petitions. "Do no be anxious about anything , but in prayer and petition, with Thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Phil 4:6"

This is hard and trust me it is...but God knows what we want, what we need and how to provide before we do. So wouldn't it be better to believe in him to provide and not worry? Yes but sadly I still do it. However God has been teaching me more and more to trust and rely on him. Pray for your future suppose for his/her walk with the Lord to continue to grow, pray they will follow after Gods heart, for them to understand you more and for your love to grow more. Pray for your future children for them to have a healthy life, be strong and smart and have a relationship with God. Pray for the family dynamics to get along, for the wedding to go smoothly and for Gods presence to be there most importantly on the day you pledge forever with your future spouse! For your love to grow more and more stronger because there is an enemey that wants to tear you apart! Who knows you could be like us and be picking out apartments on your one year anniversary and signing paperwork to get approved!

Pray about where you are to go on the honeymoon too. Maybe God doesn't want you to spend a lot on an expensive honeymoon now or he does. Maybe where you go and when could be a blessing to not just you but others as well.

8. Compromise

I have learned along the way to sometimes take the good with the bad, and to let bygones be bygones. Learn that as much as you would like you can't always have it your way and you have to let the other decide as well. Now this can be done constructively to get your way but try not to manipulate the situation too much. They are their own individual person with dreams and hopes of their own for themselves and the other person and they come with their own expectations as well! Give in a little you might be surprised and actually find yourself liking some of the same things as them or heaven forbid find out they were right on something and you liking or agreeing with them anyways. You will get other blessings in disguise when you give up some of your wants for their wants!

9. Take time out for each other from time to time.

Always remember to take a break from wedding planning and surprise them with a date night and special time for just each other with NO wedding talk allowed. It shows the guy you are thinking of them and the relationship not just the wedding all the time.

10. Learn to play fair.

OK so I stink at this but I'm learning to give the man some space, trying not to interrupt and too much. Give each other time to speak and time to think. Also give each other space when it's needed to calm down.

All this goes out to any future bride to be and those in current marriages and relationships now!

Ps...to my man thanks for choosing me and loving me for me! Jan. 3rd we celebrated being in love and our engagement...one year later we celebrated with signing an application for an apartment that will be our first apartment when we are married because we were APPROVED!!!!!! I love you!!!! May God always look after you and us!

New Years Resolutions

New Years Resolutions, well typically I just don't do them, but this year I thought I'd see if it could be accomplished and try a few.  Also, instead of calling it a resolution I'm focusing more on them being life changing goals.  I decided this is the year I BELIEVE in ME!  2012 is the year I feel as there are finally have things to really look forward to, it's a year to learn to grow, change my habits and learn and try new things!  Each year I start it off with good intentions and never follow thru with them, so this year figured if I wrote them down this time, maybe it can help me to stay focused on this weight battle that I have with myself, it can help me to move on to a brighter future and become the Woman of God and Wife I'm called and needed to be, and most importantly be the BEST person that I know I can be.  God is always working in my life and this year I feel there will be joy and celebrations for the many prayers I've put out and for the trials I've been thru.    So with out further ado...here are my not resolutions but goals to achieve this year of 2012!

My GOALS for this AMAZING 2012 year:

1.  Get married and become Mrs. Moen!!
2.  Loose weight.  I'd like to really do the WW plan better and loose at least 25 pounds to start before the wedding.
3.  Move out of my parents house!
4.  Finally have sex again after years of not!!  (after May 19th of course!)
5.  Read my bible more.
6.  Try my best not to cuss again.
7.  Watch my spending... (have to remember I'll have a Rent payment to make).
8.  Reduce the amount of things I have accumulated over the years thru donations and try to find ways to sell for cash!
9.  Learn to cook more...I don't know how to do it well w/out messing up all the time.
10.  FINALLY have my own place to live with the man I love and start our new life as Husband and wife!
11.  Expand my Creative Memories business more!
12.  Keep my job!
13.  Change my name and learn how to sign it better.  LOL
14.  Travel more if possible to new places, starting off first with our Honeymoon in Antigua!!!
15.  Get more exercise in where ever/however possible.


Look out 2012 a NEW Stefanie is coming!! :)

Finding the right words

I was reading a blog on creating wedding programs one of my wedding websites and then I found a great bible verse, but that lead me to remember I needed to select a Poem for my friend to read in the ceremony. As I kept scrolling thru her pictures and reading on at her programs the idea came me to Google what she used, maybe I would find something or use the same if I really liked it.  Picking a wedding poem for us to use for the wedding hasn't always been easy for this non-poetry woman here.  Now don't get me wrong I love how some flow and how some make you think, but I think for reading in a wedding it should represent Bob and I and this was where the daunting task to find the right one for this non-poetry minded person laid.  So I started to do a Google search of the Love Poem the blogger had used.  It was E.E. Cummings.  I read a few and nothing really clicked.  Don't know why, but I couldn't really understand most of his poems.  Is he always confusing to understand and writing weird things?  So the clicking continued and just kept looking, then started looking up other writers and still found nothing.

Before continuing on I stopped for a moment, prayed and asked God to reveal one for me.  I then thought to  Google "Love Poems" so I did and clicked on the first link (honestly I don't even remember the other links that were posted.) and was brought to several other poems and writers.  Decided on clicking thru several poems.  Then I was led to a poem that I felt was Perfect for us!  This poem spoke to my heartstrings.  It spoke to me about us!  Sometimes I'm just not sure what direction to go, but today...this poem is just the one that's needed.  I know that God lead me to it ...it fits us and I can't wait to have my fairytale dreams come true.  I'm so excited at just how things are coming together for the wedding!

Thank you Jesus for providing for me again! :)

With 158 Days left...

There begins to be the wide awakening of all the things which are still left to be done for a wedding.  We are in the midst of trying to find a limo right now.  But we are also having to choose how and where do we want the Mens Tux's to come from, and exactly which colors are the men will wear.  Do we want to use Men's Warehouse or Leesburg Bridal for the Tux's?  Will the colors look good in the pictures?  

Never mind the added stress that currently it's Christmas season.  Bob and I decided that we wouldn't really spend much on Christmas this year due to paying/saving for the wedding.  It's a little odd to get into the Christmas Holiday cheer w/out getting gifts this year but I have to say, (Ssshhh don't repeat this...) It's a little pleasent too.

Our list of things already completed:
Venue, Reception site, Photographer (and the best one at that!), Engagement pictures, Have Pre-Marital classes at church, Bride purchase DRESS, pick the wedding party, Get Florist, Choose DJ (now this was a hard one b/c Bob was a former DJ so he was very opinionated, but we finally did agree on one), Meet with Pastor to have counseling sessions, Choose our cake, Create and send our Save The Dates, purchase his/her wedding bands, Choose the bridesmaids dresses, send lists to the bridal party, choose the wedding invitations and decide on the count, Plan/book/pay for Honeymoon...

What are the other items on the list still yet to be done you are asking?  Well they are choosing Invitations (we have ones we want, but the wording is what we are working on), choose the person to make our programs, choose the limo company that we want meet again with our Pastor for another counseling session, me choose my shoes, sit with Reception venue to create and go over the dinner menus along with make the dinner menus sheets, confirm design of wedding cake, get a tan, confirm dates for bridal showers, confirm with MOH for the Bachelorette party, and many other tasks. 

So far I've gotten 50 out of 120 completed, and I'd say that's not to shabby.  Especially given the stress and everyday life that I've dealt with along the way.   Just another hurdle to jump to get to the alter to marry the man that makes me strive to be a better stronger Christian woman!

Stay tuned for more information.  Have a wonderful Christmas if I don't talk to you all again soon!

The proposal...

Ok all I had forgotten that I had a blog site.  I am going to try and use it more.  Please follow me on my wedding trials and joys.  In the mean time I know you all have been waiting to see this...  Here is how Bob proposed to me.  I also, took this from my wedding website blog so if I haven't remembered to remove some things that would be why.


Ok sorry it's taken me so long to get this story up but it's been a whirlwind for me the last several weeks!!!  I also apologize but this will be a bit long...it tells the story. Pics to come tonight when I can post pictures. Be prepared when it happens for you it might take a few days longer!

So on Monday Jan. 3rd, I had a pretty rotten day. I wasn't feeling good and to make things worse, my job is ending (Jan. 14th) I got the official letter to send to the company from my boss that morning which I had to sign stating the 14th would be my last day. It all hit that morning. The boyfriend (at that time) knew that at and wanted me to have a better day than what I was having. So I knew he was going to the store to pay for the ring, but didn't know he went to pick it up. And I had signed up for the Valentines Day Challenge that same day!  (The Valentine challenge was we were not to say the words ring, engagement or Marriage before Valentines day in regards to our waiting period.  It was a challenge to ourselves to see if we could keep it out of our vocabulary w/our men; it didn't last long for me. LOL).


After work I had an interview and then was going to go to his apartment to pick him up for dinner. I called Bob when I was on my way to his place to pick him up and he asked me "Where do you want to go? We will go anywhere you want, tonight I don't care where we eat at." So, I pondered while waiting for him to come out to the car...


And pondered finally about 5 min's after I called to tell him to come out to the car instead of me going in to get him, he showed up (and normally when I call he comes running out to the car).  And Chris Cooley was talking on the LaVar and Chad show on 106.7 the Fan radio station about his surgery and it was rather funny so I wanted him to hurry up and get out to the car so he could hear Chris sounding a little doozy from the drugs.


Bob gets in the car then says, "Crap I forgot my phone in there." he ran inside, couple minutes later he comes out only to then, say "Dang it I left my light on too."...So had to wait for him to run back in again.


When he finally came out again I said, "Did you forget anything else??"


He said, "Not for now, I'm good"


So we went to Red Lobster for dinner, which happened to be the same one where he asked my dad for permission to marry me. On the way home he was like "Let's go to the National Harbor." (One, it's a cool area just outside of DC near Alexandria, VA and it was 8:30 at night and he didn't think I was going to do it.)


I said, "OK!"

"No your not, you're just joking. You won't really go!" Bob exclaimed.


I said, "Yeah sure why not. I told you just tell me if you want to go somewhere and we can go." (caveat to story he isn't able to drive, so he can't just go there himself w/out mentioning to me and he thought that I wouldn't want to waste the gas. Shoot for a proposal heck yeah I would! LOL)


So he said, "Really?!?! Well I need to get something first then we can go so let's go back to the apartment." I said fine "I want to change out of my work clothes so that's fine."  (At this point I'm thinking OMG it could be happening tonight! :) but didn't want to overthink it).


So we get back to the apartment, I'm changing in the bathroom only to come back in the room to see a box in sticking out of his jacket...I did my best to say nothing, but eventually the topic came up because he was stating that he had it.  I said "No you don't" (really thinking sure looks like he does) and he came over to me, said, "Oh no I don't, well do you want to do this here or in a more romantic setting at the National Harbor?"


I said, "Baby it doesn't matter, anywhere with you is romantic for me most of the time. LOL!" (Thinking OMG this might really be happening...nah it couldn't be he's pulling my chain).


Bob started to walk toward me and went on to say, "I love you, and I've been really worried what your reaction will be that this isn't what you wanted." (I was like what the heck are you saying dude) "But I love you and I was wondering Stefanie, if you would marry me!?" As he asked he got down on one knee and I was crying and saying, "What? Really? Are you serious?!"  (Freaking out on the inside).  I looked at the ring and it was pretty, not the pink sapphire, but that was ok 'cause it was so stinken gorgeous!!  Of course thru my crying I was like "UH YES!!!!" LOL


We hugged and kiss more then he said "Do you still want to go to the National Harbor?...I said yeah I want to get pictures why not...


So off we went.  In the mean time he had taken the ring back to look at it...We walk around get pictures...then he goes and proposes to me again while we are there at the Harbor (this is his story he likes to tell where he proposed.)
He said, "There are some things back at the apartment that I didn't get to mention to you. I know we have been thru a lot of crap in the last 3 years, but if we could make it thru that then we can work thru anything. We've made it 3 years do you want to make it at least another 30 years? Stefanie, will you make me the happiest man in the world and marry me?"

I said, "Just 30?! What heck hopefully better be more than that!!" LOL YES!!!" :)


Just so you all know the first part of him running in and out of the apartment was because he told me he was debating on doing it at the restaurant and he kept taking the ring in and out of the apartment so nervous if he wanted to do it there or not. He was afraid of loosing it.  Oh well either way it happened that night and I now look forward to spending the rest of my life with Bob as his MRS!!! :)

Redskins make changes

Well my beloved Redskins are making some serious changes...  what's going to happen next??

REALLY SAD... SMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTT!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO :( The Redskins have released the following players: Ladell Betts, RB Rock Cartwright, RB Todd Collins, QB Cornelius Griffin, DT Marcus Mason, RB Antwaan Randle El, WR J.D. Skolnitsky, DE Fred Smoot, CB Randy Thomas, G Eddie Williams, FB Stay tuned for more from Redskins.com’s Larry Weisman.

Good News is Phillip Daniels is STAYING! :)

Govie?? Contractor??

So I'm really tired about all the ups and downs that come with being a Government Contractor lately.  Currently I am slated to take a position with my company.  I'm just waiting for the crossover of my clearances to the other agency.  With all this going on I have decided that I'm going to potentially check into becoming a government employee.  The benefits are really good and the most important thing to me lately is Job SECURITY!!!!! I won't have to worry about being let go and having to move to another job or another company.  It seems to me to be a great idea...we shall see what happens.

Of course I'm trying to pray about this so we shall see. 

Vegas Baby!

I'm going to Vegas!!! Can you believe it! yep going at the end of the month for 5 days and 4 ngts with a friend. I can't wait! I'll post all about it when I get back. I've been there several times before but this time I get to go with a good friend. Keep me in your prayers, thanks!

new...

I'm new to this site. so bear w/me. I think i can get used to it except I don't like I can't keep adding things for websites under one section it keeps making more. (Had to figure things out...got it working now.)